You came home today. Technically I guess it was yesterday as its' now about 2 O'clock in the morning. I was sitting here in bed unable to sleep. Just watching you sleep. Your father is next to me, out like a light. You sleep like him you know. When your out, your out! Anyway, I was here, watching you and I started to cry. The good kind. Unfortunately "good" or "bad" cries end the same way. With a red blotchy face. My emotions, all my emotions are attached to my tear ducts. You get that from me. Sorry about that. :)
So I was there crying. Your just so small and fragile. Completely depending on us for everything. And for a moment I was just so scared. I want to do this right for you. The "Mom" thing. No , I need to do this right for you. For so long. I wanted to be a good wife and good mother. When we were told it couldn't ever happen. I was devastated. Guess we proved them wrong didn't we kid.
So me being me. I made a list. You'll notice in the future that I do that. A lot. I made a kind of check list.
- Say I love you everyday! (even when I might not like you very much when your up at 3 am)
- Kiss, hug and hold you.
- Never fail to remind you how important you are. That YOU MATTER
What I'm trying to say is. I guess. I can promise you there will be times when your not happy with me. That one or both of us will walk away from the other thinking "Your Impossible". But I can also promise you I will always listen. I will always try my hardest.
Most of all. I will love you for as long as I live, and beyond.
I Love you Little Girl
Always and Forever