"Take love, multiply it by infinity and take it to the depths of forever...

... and you still have only a glimpse of how I feel for you."

- Meet Joe Black

Thursday, May 31, 2012

Confessions of a Stay At Home Mama...

Dear Daughter

Recently, Jess Constable of Makeunder My Life wrote a blog post. It sparked a twitter conversation about how over styled and/or perfect our lives can appear on blogs/Facebook/Pinterest yada yada. Most people go on these social media sites to share thoughts, ideas that inspire us, day to day living, photos, gorgeous products or homes we covet etc. From the outside looking in, lives can sometimes appear rosier than they are.

Then look at things from a woman's perspective. Or a mother's. A daughters. A friend.  Most of us can't help it. We look at other peoples Facebook feeds and think "Oh.My.Lanta! That is amazing" or "How does she find the time" or "I wish I had thought of that". Or the past comment I got "Did you really do that , or are you just showing off". Now the last was said in a joking manner, but to me it was hurtful...and thought provoking.  Do I only post, tag, photograph the good, and leave out the bad....  

Heck Ya I do! Why the H.E. Double hockey stick would I photograph a picture of your crib after you decided that "nope, no diaper for me...oh and btw I made a doodie"
Does that  sound like something Id be ecstatic about at 3 in the morning? Nope! 

Now in saying that, I have posted about things that have just driven me up the wall, made me want to cry and induced almost blubbering, but all in all I mostly post about good things. Happy things. Things that make me go "awww, I wish you stayed this size/age/temperament for eva and eva"

Then a challenge was issued. To share things we wouldn't typically talk about on our walls,blogs, and boards . Things like  imperfections, insecurities, quirks, etc.

So here goes...The Confessions of THIS Stay At Home Mama....

1) In the morning (read:every morning) I stick you on the couch with a glass of milk and put Elmo/Dora/Super Readers on until the coffee is made. Until that glorious machine stops sputtering, I'm a walking zombie with no interest in changing out of my sweats.

2) Besides the Go-To Craft Cupboard upstairs, I have 2 large boxes of nothing but scrapbook paper, 13 boxes of misc. craft supplies, 138 balls of yarn, 11 empty scrapbooks and 4, 2 gallon bottles filled with buttons, stamps and beads that I refuse to "Yard Sale" because I know ONE DAY I will use them....You say hoarder, I call it thinking ahead.

3) I own 27.5  of what I call "Happy Socks".  Leopard print, smiley faces, lights, feathers and even Winnie the Pooh are all part of my collection. Others don't know I'm wearing them, but I do. And that gives me a little Happy Oh So Secret Perk Up to my day!

4) On our bed, we have two comforters. One duvet and and a thin quilt. That's right, your Daddy and I rarely share a blanket. You see, he's a human heater and I'm a Popsicle most of the time. We love each other so much, but only seek the "shared blanket time" when my feet are cold or your father and I are....well.. you know...

5)Yes, we really do bake at least twice a week. Yes we really do crafts several times a week. And yes you get your "Canadian Physical Recomendation" of 3 hours  a day of active play. BUT... I'm a homebody, so if the choice is to have that play in at the park/ neighboring field or home...
I choose the playroom or backyard 7 times out of 10.  Why? No really good excuse...But if I'd have to say....As a red head, the sun and I have a love/hate relationship. Mosquitoes think I'm a Kings Palace Buffet, Sand ALWAYS gets in places it shouldn't be, and it never fails I trip/slip/hulk stomp a hole in the ground and end up on my patootie.

6)Our house is clean. I make sure that things are swept,mopped and germ free. But if you want to haggle the difference between Clean Vs Tidy....Well...Let's just say our home looks "lived in" . We have a lot going on throughout the day, so who could blame me if I chose Slime Making over laundry....Who?

7) I'm going to  contradict myself and say I LOVE Going out! (see#5)..I LOVE grocery shopping. I LOVE going to the post office. I LOVE those mundane errands that others think are a nusence because they get me out of the house doing something different. I'm like a puppy as soon as we get in the car. Big smile on my face, head halfway out the window, bopping to some tunes. I easily waste a few hours strolling Walmart's isle's and don't even get me started on the Dollar Store.

8)The Library is like my little piece of Heaven on Earth. Really, I could go there everyday and never be bored. You and I go a handful of  times a week. Between drop in play, Rhyme Time and our weekly family stop off, we probably spend upwards of 6 hours at the library every week. (ok, sometimes more) Reading might be an obsession in our house, but there are worse obsessions. Emirite?!!?

9) I sometimes bribe you to eat your meals by promising candy or ice cream afterwards... then sometimes I conveniently forget.....Then I  give you Yogurt Popcicles or Fruit Kabobs instead. Yes. I'm a briber, and a  liar...... and I ate your candy.

10) Sometimes I think I'm becoming my mother . Don't get me wrong, I love my mother! But I find myself saying some of the things  she used to say, that at the time I thought were ridiculous and drove me to the brink of insanity. Of course, anything I might say is not serious, and just something that happens to fit the situation...
Like ...
"Let me finish doing your hair or I will snatch you bald headed"(what does that even mean?)
"Ohh Baby, did you squat your finger in the cupboard...lemme kissem better!" (squat??)
"Noo lovey, those are Mama's candies....you get these yummy dried fruit ones" (total B.S.)
"You look like an orphan" (short pants, holey clothes, stains etc)
"Don't have a canary!" or "Conniption Fit!" (Is that even possible?Nope!)
"Open Your Ears By'"(She still says this, and now I do....I still don't know what it means...)

I also find myself laughing like her, that full body-throw your head back-hear you a block away, laugh. I'm sure 20-30- years from now, you'll be saying the same things, and shaking your head thinking "Oh, No! I'm turning into my mother!"

So there it is. Well a few of them at least. I assure there are other things I do that would make "scaredy face" on some other parents, that I do with no hesitation. 

 I've said it before, and I'll say it again....

Nope, I'm not perfect. But I do my best. I love deeply and whole heartily. I truly BELIEVE that good things are going to happen, and I try to be thankful at least once a day...

I love you little girl
Always & Forever

No comments:

Post a Comment